Mine Your Own Business
By Margot Barker-Fletchly for C-Suite Outsider
Chances are you’ve heard a lot about the power of big data in recent years – how it can be used to better understand your customers, users and even your competition. Chances are you’ve also mostly left it to the experts in your research and strategy departments bring you the best gems and trends. But a recent article published in Lurkify Weekly might have you insourcing that job very quickly.
According to Chief Technological Strategist Lipp Davidson, there’s a “small data” honeypot right under our noses. It’s one that’s likely to change the way you work, the way you interact with workforce and the whole workplace dynamic. “You’ll never look at your people the same way again,” says Davidson, “Be forewarned.” This small data treasure trove is – yep, you guessed it: Your own employees.
As owner and administrator of virtually all the hardware and software your people use on a daily basis, not to mention anything traveling over your wireless routers and network (read: private device data), you have virtually unlimited access to each of your employee’s hopes, fears, anxieties and fantasies. You just haven’t thought to look yet.
Our most private, secret, personal things are our thoughts, and since humanity’s earliest days, those thoughts were only shared when we shared them intentionally. But today our browser history, emails and social media activity coalesce into a clear indication of our feelings, dreams and insecurities. And when you chart those data points over time, you can create a startlingly accurate psychological profile of each of your people – one that’s surprisingly easy to exploit.
But, as Davidson suggests, “Be patient. Don’t show your hand to soon. It’s best to use little snippets of browser history or social media activity to scare some loyalty and obedience into your workforce.” Davidson argues that if they catch on too quickly, they’re likely to stop unwittingly providing data points. “Let it hang over their heads,” he said. “There’s no hurry.”
If you’re worried about legal ramifications (and Davidson argues you shouldn’t be), just add this line of text to your existing device and internet usage agreement. It guarantees your right to their data in perpetuity. So now, their thoughts are not only readable, trackable and predictable; they’re immortal. And they’re yours forever.
(obviously, this is satire.)
